True Blood Season 5 Finale “Save Yourself”

The show begins where it left off last week, Russell heading straight for the faeries. He is soon killed by Eric. Sookie, oblivious to the threat of Nora, makes a dash for Jason. Nora makes a run for Sookie but is stopped by Eric. He makes it clear that Sookie is a friend and that she is not to feed from her. Nora is obviously struggling to not drain Sookie the entire time she is in her presence. The only thing stopping her is the threat of Eric. Nora does say something of interest, that Sookie smells like something she once dreamed of. Did that mean anything or are the writers just playing with us? Meanwhile, Jason is obviously working with a major concussion. He is seeing and talking to his deceased mother and father who, after being drained by a vampire, are both fanger haters. Apparently going through something like that leaves you with some resentment.

The following day Martha shows up at Jackson’s trailer looking for Alcide. With her, a strung out Rikki who was forced to take V. Jackson has just what she needs to sweat the vampire blood out. Alcide decides stop JD for good. Jason stops gather supplies to kill vampires. Over at Merlotte’s Bar Lafayette makes some margaritas and shakes his sexy bootay with Holly and Arlene but the fun is only beginning for the three of them. Soon Andy arrives with Maurella where she puts on a show and Andy becomes a proud Papa.

The underground compound is buzzing with excitement. Sam and Luna make a break for it. Eric, Nora, Sookie, Jason, and Tara get clearance from Bill. Then all hell breaks loose! Jason kills a bunch of vampires, Sookie and Tara go to the cells to get Jessica and Pam while Eric and Nora kill the rest of the guards and take down the security system. Salome has a few wardrobe changes and drinks what she believes is Lilith’s blood. Unfortunately for her, it’s blood poisoned with silver, weakening her so Bill could easily destroy her. Sookie and Eric try to talk sense into Bill but he has none. Bill drinks the blood. The end of the episode was a new beginning of sorts. As Salome so eloquently put it, ‘It’s the fucking rapture!’.

After watching the last True Blood episode of the season I was completely speechless. Well, maybe not completely. I did have enough sense to say “Holy Fucking Shit!”, when it was all said and done. The Season 5 Finale’s Top Moments are doubled to 10 this week. Why? Because it was that fucking good!

Top 10 Moments of “Save Yourself”

Eric Gets His Retribution
Russell is heading straight for the faeries while they are blasting him with their light, including Sookie’s crappy light, but he is not affected by any of it. All of a sudden our sexy Viking Warrior comes from behind and grabs Russell. Without saying a word, he stakes him and Russell turns to goo, putting an end to him once and for all. Eric then says, “Well, that felt even better than I thought it would”. I am sad to see Russell go, he was extremely entertaining. He will be missed!

It Began As A Plan
Eric and Nora go to Fangtasia only to learn from Tara that Pam has been taken by the Authority. They immediately jump into action to get her out. They go to enlist Sookie’s help to save Jessica and Pam, and to talk some sense into Bill. Tara reminds Sookie that she owes Pam. Eric tells Sookie that Bill is behind the True Blood bombings and he is unraveling fast. Eric thinks if anyone can get through to him she can. She agrees and Jason insists to go with them to protect Sookie.

Alcide Becomes Pack Master
After Rikki tells them what happened to her and the young girls in the pack Alcide is furious. His father helps him come to the realization that the only way to beat JD is to do V himself. His father then tells him that he has some of the best V you can get. When Alcide finds JD he is draining a vampire with the pack. Wasting no time, Alcide jumps right to beating the shit out of JD. Someone comes to his defense but Alcides dad stops him, then Martha comes out with a bow and arrow telling them to stay out of it, that it’s between Alcide and JD. Alcide kills him and takes his rightful place as packmaster. He gives anyone a chance to fight him right then and there or 24 hours to get out of the area but they all kneel to him, accepting him as their leader. He tells them that they will not do V anymore or take advantage of the ones younger and weaker. They will all choose pack and respect themselves. It’s a new beginning for Alcide and maybe even Jackson.

Luna Becomes Steve
Luna and Sam hatch a plan to get Emma out. Luna shifts into Steve Newlin and gets Emma out of the cage. They try to leave through the elevators but Luna is stopped by the vampire at the front desk, Chelsea, to talk. Chelsea begins to notice that he isn’t speaking with his southern accent. While she tries to explain it away Rosalyn shows up fuming from the stunt that Steve and Russell pulled with the fraternity. She brings them up to send a statement to the press. While Luna is reading the TelePrompTer she begins to get sick, throwing up blood, and changing back into herself on live television. She then tells the world that the vampires are keeping humans hostage, feeding on them, and killing them in an underground bunker in New Orleans. Rosalyn kills the camera and flashes fang. Sam, as a fly, flies into her mouth and down into her body and shifts back into himself while destroying Rosalyn completely. That was pretty damn impressive!

It’s A Girl! And Another, and Another, and Another!
Andy brings Maurella into Sam’s Bar to tell Holly the whole truth. As he is beginning she already knows what he is about to tell her and asks who and how many times. He tells her twice, once before they were together and once after, a week ago. Then he tells her that she’s pregnant. That’s when we hear Maurella scream that he light broke which is just too funny and too perfect. As luck would have it, Holly is the one who is midwifing. Maurella is really enjoying labor to put it mildly. Lafayette and Arlene are getting a kick out of the whole thing. When it’s finally over there are four perfect baby girls with no blood on them and no cords attached. Maurella just pops up as if she didn’t just give birth to four babies and tells Andy that it is his sacred duty to raise them and make sure that at least half make it to adulthood. Andy is in for it now! I am hoping that Holly helps him raise them, once she gets over the anger.

Bill, The Master Manipulator
Salome asks Bill where Kibwe is. He tells her that he found him as he was about to drink Lilith’s blood claiming that she chose him so he killed him. Then he tells her that Lilith appeared to him and you can just see the look of scathing hot anger in her eyes. But our master manipulator tells her that Lilith told him that she was chosen to be the prophet for the new age and he was to serve and protect her. Salome is just delighted at this news.

The Rescue Mission
Once clearance is given, they enter the compound and Jason kills Chelsea along with the guards that come running. Eric and Nora hide up by the ceiling until all the guards usher in. In one quick sweep Eric takes out all of them and Nora begins to disengage the system. Once that is done Sookie and Tara are able to break free Jessica and Pam. Tara doesnt even wait for Sookie to open the silver bars and once she does she gives Pam a proper hello. They all meet at the elevators, Eric and Pam share a moment and he tells them all to go up and he and Sookie will come soon. First they must try to get through to Bill.

The Kiss
This has to be elaborated on. They have been leading up to this all season long. Once Pam saw Tara you could see so much heat in their gazes. They just kept making eyes at each other until Tara ripped the door open and they finally had that long overdue kiss!

Salome’s Last Meal
Bill said it perfectly, Salome was so impatient and full of herself that she didn’t even smell the silver that Bill put into the blood. Salome was apalled thinking that he would defile the Mothers blood but he assured her that he would never desecrate the Holy Grail as he showed her the blood. Salome, accepting her fate, looks at Bill lovingly and tells him that Lilith chose wisely. Another great character killed off.

Bill, Reborn A God
Sookie and Erics attempt to save Bill from Lilith was a complete failure. Bill tells Sookie that she is an abomination and he then drinks the blood and shocks us all by turning to goo. That’s hardly the end of him though, he begins to rise from the blood reborn a god! As he rises, he is naked and covered in blood, just as Lilith was. When he was finished rising he let out a giant set of fangs and a deafening roar. The last thing we see and hear is Eric screaming at Sookie, “RUN!”.

Favorite Quote of The Week
This is not a movement, Bill. This is the fucking rapture! All you’ve seen, you still doubt. That is why I am stronger. –Salome

True Blood “Sunset”

After this weeks episode we are left with just one more. I can only imagine how insane it will be. Tonight was one hell of an episode to put it mildly. Bill is becoming more and more delusional. Pam’s explanation of it being the result of living in a nest explains a lot about the why. Although, I do prefer Bill as the villain than the heart sick moron. To drink, or not to drink, that is the question! The General comes looking for Roman and isn’t happy to find out that he is gone. He tells them that the government is ready to kick some vampire ass if they don’t get back to mainstreaming, pronto. The General teases us about weapons we have never seen and then he gets killed! They have to deliver after getting us excited like that. Oh, hello, baby! Andy is told about the baby. Wow, one week later and she is about to pop! That’s not good news for Holly. Andy did a bad, bad thing!

Jessica is ordered to turn Jason by Bill and she doesn’t play by the rules. She ends up on Pam’s doorstep asking to be hidden. Doesn’t it just figure that the former sheriff of area 5, RIP, was Rosalyn’s progeny! Great going Tara, you’ve gone and stepped in it this time, again! Pam takes the blame for the murder and is arrested. Rosalyn just had to walk into the one place she was hiding at. Jessica couldn’t have worse luck if she broke every mirror in Bon Temps. Jessica sure got it handed to her when she was brought back to Bill. No one likes to hear the truth, especially the severely delusional. When Sam and Luna find Emma they are caught by guards who think they are the food and they got out. When they are told that Compton sends for breakfast Sam volunteers to go. Putting his life on the line for Luna and Emma, deja vu? Here are my top 5 moments of ‘Sunset’.

Visions From Lilith
Seems that Lilith was making the rounds this week to her followers. First To Bill, who turned it down, saying he was not worthy, then to Kibwe, who lost his head over it, and then to Salome. The wicked seductress would be perfect to lead. Who else is exactly like Lilith? Looks like Lilith is playing games with her followers. She loves violence, blood, and death. What better than to have them kill each other over the right to drink her blood and rule. Lilith only believes in herself, a godless god. What do you think of Lilith, is she really the first vampire? Or just a single vampire that led others to believe she was the first?

Nora and Eric Make A Break
After Nora reflected on Godric’s words of warning she realized the error of her ways and begs Eric to forgive her. I would say that he did by the way he power mounted her. Eric, the clever fucker that he is, saw a perfect opportunity for escape by killing the general and taking Nora with him to do “damage control”. Bill, thinking he’s a clever fucker, sends guards with them for “back up”. After Eric killed their back up Nora dropped her Lilith necklace to the ground and together they took to the sky.

Sookie Meets An Elder
Sookie is told that the Elder operates on a different frequency than they do. I guess that is Faery code for eccentric. She asks Sookie if she thinks it’s a coincidence that she is so attracted to vampires. That her and Worlow’s destiny is entwined. She will be tested. Sookie wants more but is soon interrupted by Jason. Who, when pulled in, tells them all about Russell Edgington and how he is after Sookie’s blood, again. The Elder becomes upset at the knowledge that Russell is alive. The Elder announces that they must and they will fight along side Sookie. Can the faeries handle Russell? Or will Worlow show up and save Sookie?

Alcide and Pops, Vampire Slayers
Alcide leaves the fenced area to save a woman from the baby vampires harassing her. His dad comments that he always has to be the hero. Alcide says that he was taught not to be a coward and takes off for the vampires. He manages to kill one right away but gets grabbed by one of them. Dear old Dad comes out of no where and kills the vampire standing in front of Alcide, scaring the one holding him off. I guess she doesn’t want to end up goo like her friends.

Russell Gets His Faery
When Jason brings Russell and Steve to the field where the faeries are they both can smell them but they cannot see them and it drives them crazy. Russell threatens to kill Jason if Sookie doesn’t show herself. Instead the Elder comes and when Steve goes for her she blasts the little twerp away. Russell is impressed with her voltage referring to her as being ‘turbo charged’. He really does have a way with words, doesn’t he? She tries to banish him twice but misses, hitting Jason once instead, ouch! When you are a vampire for 3000 years you gain super speed. He comes in from behind and drains the Elder. He becomes charged with her light and is able to see all the faeries standing there. How will they survive?

Favorite Quote of The Week
There is a reason that you find vampires irresistible. A reason that you slut your heart out to every cute guy out there with fangs. –Faery Elder

True Blood “Gone, Gone, Gone”

Only 2 more episodes left of True Blood! I can’t believe it’s already coming to the end of season 5. This has been an incredible ride and its not over quite yet. This week’s True Blood was another amazing episode. It began with Molly receiving the iStake and Sookie doing some staking of her own when she is attacked by the town coroner turned newborn vampire. Hoyt announces he is leaving for work in Alaska and demands that Jessica glamours him to forget that her and Jason ever existed. Jessica is then summoned by Bill who introduces the Vampire Bible to her. Maybe she can save Bill and bring him to his senses. Meanwhile, Sam and Luna hitch a ride in Steve Newlin’s bag as mice to gain entrance to the Authority’s Headquarters. This week’s episode seemed like the show was setting up for the big ending. I just can’t wait! Until then, here are my top 5 moments of “Gone, Gone, Gone”.

Eric and Nora envision Lilith killing Godric
In an attempt to save Eric, Nora and Bill force him to take the blood of Lilith and Nora also takes her blood. They soon see Godric appear to them and tell them that Lilith is a godless god and that he has evolved. Lilith then appears and rips his head off. We then see both bow to Lilith. Eric then says that he serves Lilith now, he even kneels to Russell. Is he faking or really reborn? I hope he is faking! I am afraid he isn’t.

Goodbye Sheriff!
Tara calls on the new sheriff of Area 5 to help her. She tells him she is worried that she killed Ginger. When he bends over Ginger to check, ginger stabs him and Tara cuts his head off. Pam walks in and Tara pronounces that they aren’t going to run. I love the vampire Tara!

Andy is A Daddy!
Maurella is sporting a baby bump! How cute is it that Andy is going to be a daddy of a little half fae, half human. Will he find out? If he does, where will that leave Holly?

Russell Shows His True Self
He tries to persuade the others to find the faeries and take their blood to study it and try to make synthetic faery blood like they did with human blood for True Blood. They all spoke against it. Salome saying that they are of the night, the sun is forbidden, and they are an abomination. He strikes Salome and goes on a rant about how he is 3000 years old and can kill them all. He tells them that they will not stop him and he will have the sun. This doesn’t look good for the fae.

Sookie and Jason Discover Some Disturbing News
Jason finds a hidden letter that was written in an unknown language. They take the letter to Claude but he cannot read it either, instead they bring an older fae who may be able to know what is written. Maurella comes over to them (baby bump!) and uses a spell to translate the letter. It seems that John Williams Stackhouse made an agreement in 1702 with Worlow that he grants him his first fae female born descendant. Claude drops the bomb that Sookie is the first female born Fae since 1702. Showdown with Worlow is coming!

Favorite Quote of The Week
We procreate because we want to not because some dickhead dipped in afterbirth told us to.–Pam

True Blood “Everybody Wants To Rule The World”

True Blood was explosive tonight! The Authority begins the attack on the True Blood factory’s. There’s a new blue eyed sheriff in Area 5 who announced that the Monarch’s have lifted the ban on public feeding. I wonder what complications he will create for Pam and Tara. Speaking of Pam and Tara, I love the dynamic between the two. They are so much alike and perfect for each other. Meanwhile, Alcide remembers the past and visits his father. Also, Steve Newlin, was given Emma as a present by Russell, who ripped Emma from Martha’s arms, Luna is going to flip the fuck out. I can’t wait to see how she is rescued from that sniveling little twerp. Tonight’s episode was great, wouldn’t expect anything less. Here are my top 5 moments of “Everybody Wants To Rule The World”.

The Dragon is Revealed
Last week I said it was Bud Dearborn and I was wrong. While Bud was a major part of it all, the Dragon ended up being his lover, Sweetie. Sookie read her mind and found that all her hate stemmed from her man leaving her for a shifter. Nothing scarier than a woman scorned. Sweetie isn’t so sweet these days.

Bill’s Visions
Salome was dancing and talked about how she will now be more than a naked girl with a mans head in her lap, she will be linked with Lilith forever. She told him he was chosen as hers, they will birth a new world together. Bill asked what if he doesn’t want to be chosen, she replied that Lilith’s blood is in him and to let it be his guide. When they began making love, he first envisioned Sookie and drained her. Then he saw Lilith covered in blood underneath him. She turned over so she was on top and gave him her neck, then he saw Salome again. How’s that for guidance?

Sam and Luna Have Revenge
As the Obama Masked group were filming the feeding of Sookie and Hoyt to the pigs, Sam caught Sookie as they threw her in. He fought with the remaining guys as the Dragon fled. Soon the police arrived and Andy told Bud it’s over. Bud goes out raising his shovel at Sam, suicide by cop. We then see Luna as a German Sheperd going after Sweetie, the Dragon. She jumps on her while shifting back and gives her a beating for herself, Sam, and her daughter. Loved seeing Luna kick ass.

Terry Does The Right Thing
Patrick took Arlene hostage to bring Terry out to kill him. When Terry arrived Patrick had him disarm and get on his knees. Patrick had a sad story about his girl being pregnant and him promising that he would come home. Arlene didn’t give a rats ass about his sob story, she stabs him in the neck with a pencil. Terry knocks the gun out of his hand and Arlene grabs it and points it to Patricks head. We then see Terry standing over Patrick, who is the one on his knees now. He is having trouble shooting Patrick and Patrick sees that and tries to take advantage of the weakness. Then the spirit of the woman he killed comes to him and tells Terry to do what is right. That’s when Terry shoots him twice and the curse is lifted. The Ifrit takes Patrick, leaving only a puddle of blood behind.

Molly and Eric’s Plan is A Bust
After Eric drugs Nora, Bill comes in and Eric is relieved at first. That ends when the elevator opens and Salome is there with men to take Eric in custody. Eric calls him a fucking traitor and Bill calmly tells him that he is doing this for him, that he has been chosen by Lilith, that this is what God wants. I will admit that as Eric walks by, Bill looks torn and regretful. One look at Salome and he looks very pleased with himself. I just don’t know what Bill is up to.

Favorite Quote of The Week
Just because we drank a bitch together does not make us Oprah and Gale! –Pam

True Blood “Somebody That I Used To Know”

This weeks episode was directed by Stephen Moyer (Bill). He did a great job in doing so. He put together a great sex scene between Alcide and Rikki, loved how he threw her across the room and jumped on her while they growled at each other. Eric is on the outs with Nora after she says bad things about Godric. Lafayette tries to help Terry and Patrick but instead is possessed by the spirit of the woman who put the curse on them. She says the only way for the curse to stop is if Terry kills Patrick or Patrick kills Terry, Patrick runs away. Alcide refuses to compete after seeing that they have to chase and kill a human. This was not what I expected, I expected a fight to the death. That was really disappointing. Here are 5 things that I wasn’t disappointed with in “Somebody That I Used To Know”.

Sookie Forms A Psychic Bond With A Vampire
Sookie and Jason join with the faeries to find out who the vampire was that killed their parents. They all go to the bridge and Sookie sees everything through her mothers eyes. Before she can see the vampires face, she begins to see from the vampires point of view. Claude is very freaked out to learn that. He said that the Elders will not be happy about it. Jason only cares about what will happen with Sookie. From the vampires eyes Sookie learns his name, Worlow. Worlow sends Sookie a vision saying that he is coming for her and that she is his.

Pam gives Tara a Present
Tara has a blast from the past when a racist bitch from high school comes in and talks trash to Tara. Tara threatens her and Pam comes over to apologize to the woman. Before she leaves she says more mean things. Afterwards, Pam brings Tara down to the basement to show her a surprise. Tara is confused because Pam was mad when she wasn’t nice to Tracy at the bar. Pam told her that she doesn’t know her that well, that her mad face and her happy face are the same. God, I love Pam! Then she glamours Tracy to want Tara to feed from her and that Tara is perfect and she lives to please Tara. Tara loves this gift from Pam.

Hoyt Saves Jessica
Hoyt’s new buddies captured Jessica so he could kill her, they locked him in a room until he did it. He points the gun at her head and then we hear the shot go off. The guy walks in and Hoyt asks where the guys are, he says they all left. That’s when Jessica comes from behind the door and kills the guy. Hoyt goes for help because it’s day. He walks until night when a truck comes up and stopped. He says its nice to see a friendly face, then the person pulls a gun on him. I think that it’s Dragon and he obviously seems to know him. I might very well be wrong, but I think dragon is the former Sheriff, Bud. I don’t really see why else they would have him in a previous episode, surely not just for Andy to beg him to come back.

Sam and Sa– uh, Luna
When Luna was in Sam’s body I couldn’t help but laugh the whole time. To see ‘Sam’ act as Luna was hilarious. I loved when they were on the couch and they were making up with each other. It was too funny to think that they might kiss each other!

Bill is Seduced by The Seductress
After the fun night out, Salome brings Bill to her room where there is a woman tied to the bed. She tells Bill that she is for him, from her. He refuses, telling her that he is not interested, but she becomes angry that he would turn down a gift from her. That this is who he is. He said that he had children and she countered that if he loved his family, then he should have made them as he was. He then remembers when his daughter begged him to make her like him so she would not die, he refused her then, believing that what happened to him was a curse. Bill gives into the urge to feed and takes the woman. Bill is evolving, as he told Eric when asked what he was doing when he suggested that they destroy the True Blood Factories.

Favorite Quote of The Week
You don’t know me that well. My angry face and my happy face are the same. –Pam

True Blood “In The Beginning”

This weeks True Blood was brilliant! After last weeks I said that was the best one so far. Now I’m saying it again about this weeks episode. This season is likely to be my favorite one if it continues to be this good. This week Sookie learns that if she isn’t careful about using her magic, she will lose it and become fully human, she turns out to like the idea of being normal. Sam finds the Obama masks at the Stake House as well as the scents of all the guys involved. We were able to see their faces, not that I recognized anyone. But Hoyt did and he is happy to be apart of their little hate group. This group is being used by someone they call ‘Dragon’. This Dragon person is obviously the brains behind the operation since these guys are way too stupid to organize anything, the puppet master and the puppets. These puppets were really upset when they found out that Junior was killed. Salome is every bit the snake I knew she was. Sam finds one of the guys. Here are my top 5 moment of “In The Beginning”.

Tara Has A Visitor
Her mother comes to the club to disown Tara. Tara flashes fangs at Lettie Mae and tells her that she will see her again. Pam goes to comfort an emotional Tara in the office. Pam promises Tara that in 100 years she won’t even remember her and tells her that she is not her mother anymore. Tara, realizing what Pam is saying, hugs her. Pam becomes uncomfortable and tells her to go back to dancing, she’s good at it.

The Ceremony
All of the Vampires at the Authority Headquarters attend a ceremony where Salome explains that she forgives Russell for killing Roman because Russell announces that he has taken back everything he has said, that he believes in Lilith. Nora and Salome offer to share the power with this group and share Lilith’s blood. Dieter walks forward saying that all of this is blasphemous and that he will not take part in this. Then he loses a head. After that no one else seems to have any qualms about partaking in this ceremony. Not that they would after seeing Dieter lose his head. I think that Dieter Braun and Rosalyn Harris were the only ones left with the same beliefs as Roman. Eric and Bill drink some of the blood thinking that nothing will happen. They were so wrong about that!

Lafayette Gets Tied Up
When he arrives at Bartolo’s house he finds Jesus’ head (so that’s who took the body!) on a chair and a gun pointed at him. Bartolo tells him that he is taking back what belongs to his family. Lafayette is tied up in a chair with his mouth sewn shut while Bartolo’s pregnant wife is laying on the floor. Bartolo plans to kill him and have the demon go into the baby. Before Bartolo has a chance to carry out his plan his wife kills him and frees Lafayette. That was a close one! I did not know how he was going to get out of that one.

Jason Shoots Jessica
Jason tastes someone’s blood while kissing Jessica and gets really angry that she was just feeding and didn’t tell him. He called the guy out to meet him since he already had his blood in his mouth. Could have been worse, she could have been blowing him and passed along his sperm. She ended up biting Jason and he shot her in the head. I don’t see them making up anytime soon.

The Wild Vampire’s Night Out
This had to be the best part, in my opinion. Walking the streets of New Orleans on the most powerful V there is. They begin to terrorize humans in the street, and one in a car. Did anyone else notice Bill on Eric’s back as they were walking the streets? Hilarious! We see a private party where a woman is singing bad karaoke. All of a sudden Russell appears and everyone freaks out. Then the entire group of vampires appear at the entrance and they all begin to feed. As they are draining all the humans, everyone begins to see a blood drop fall to the floor of the stage where Lilith materializes and walks over to Nora, giving her approval for what she is doing. All the vampires see this vision and they are captivated by her. All of a sudden Godric appears to Eric and tells him that he knows this is wrong but his sister doesn’t know better. Godric tells Eric he must save his sister.

Favorite Quote of The Week
Never! You Bible banging cunts! — Eric

True Blood “Hopeless”

This weeks True Blood was incredible. Non stop action from beginning to end. It began with Alcide, Eric and Bill being attacked by werewolves. Russell attempts to bite Sookie but she blasts him with her light. Eric and Bill gain control over Russell and before they can make a decision on whether they bring him in or kill him, the Authority member, Kibwe, shows up with a team of men to bring Russell in, along with Eric and Bill. Tara and Jessica continue their fight. Luna and Sam survive while Emma runs to Martha Bozeman, her Grandma. Hoyt makes a fool out of himself, as usual. Andy questions the salesman at the Stake House. When he reaches for a weapon to kill Andy, Sam shoots a cross bow through the guys chest. I knew that douche bag was apart of it! I guess it was kind of obvious. This week was by far the most exciting episode yet. Here is my top 5 moments of “Hopeless”.

Alcide Challenges JD
After he remembered what happened while going after Russell, he remembered JD being there. Concerned for the pack that follows him, he goes and accuses him of using V and being in league with a Vampire. He denies all this but Alcide knows better. He challenges his position of pack master. When he is told that he needs someone in the pack to volunteer to be his second, Rikki says that she will do it. She seems to hate him more than Alcide does. Alcide tells them to tell him when and where. I can’t wait for this.

Hoyt is Saved
Hoyt tells a male vampire to continue to drain him when the vampire stopped feeding. The vampire obliged and continued to feed. That’s when a van stopped in front of them and shot the vampire, making him goo. The Obama masked man recognized Hoyt and took him into the van with them, saying that he saved his life.

Sookie Discovers She is to Blame
Sookie and Jason go and search for the club in the field. Sookie finds it and brings Jason inside with her. They speak with Claude and he tells her what happened the night their parents died. They were driving on a bridge while it was raining and they saw a man in a trench coat standing in the middle of the bridge. The vampire killed their parents and went looking for a band aid with Sookie’s blood on it. Sookie is so upset to learn that her parents died because a vampire smelled her blood in the backseat, she tried to use her light but it short circuited causing her to be the one to get blasted by light instead.

Eric Visits His Sister
After speaking with Roman, he went into the cells to talk to Nora. She was so consumed with her prayers that she ignored him. She did take notice when Russell came, followed by Salome. Salome told Nora that Russell’s execution was going to take place tonight. Nora became thrilled at hearing this. She began to praise Lilith saying that it was happening and that it is a miracle. All part of her plan. Eric becomes disturbed by this and asks her if she was the one who dug up Russell. She said she was not. I just know it was Salome!

Russell Kills Roman
Russell is brought before the Authority to be executed by Roman. They have words with each other and Roman seems very satisfied with himself. He tries to activate the harness but when nothing happens, suddenly Russell is above Roman holding a stake and says “Peace is for pussies!”. Then he stakes Roman, killing him. I will miss Roman, I really liked him. But I am thrilled to have Russell back!

Favorite Quote of The Week
You’re fucking worse than humans. You might as well be praying to leprechauns or unicorns, or the motherfucking Kardashians! That makes just as much sense. –Russell Edgington

True Blood “Let’s Boot and Rally”

This weeks True Blood episode had Sookie mixed up in vampire business. Eric and Bill find what they are looking for. Alcide gets glamoured by Eric. Jason is haunted by dreams of his parents.Tara gets some friendly advice from Jessica. Roman reflects on what they stand for and wonders how Chancellor Drew lost his way. Nora continues to pray to Lilith and tells the Authority that the Sanguinistas will rise and the warriors of Lilith are coming for them all. Terry learns what has been terrorizing them. Lafayette has a visitor. A group of stupid rednecks with Obama masks shoot Sam and Luna. Also, Russell asks Eric and Bill what took them so long.

Doug’s Memories
Doug has seen the woman who dug Russell out, Bill assumes it is Nora, although I believe it is Salome. He leads them to a facility where there are people waiting to be fed to Russell. They have all seen the woman vampire and are very frightened of her for obvious reasons. They proceed to find Russell through Doug and come face to face with him. Eric tells him they are here to finish what they started. Russell replies that they give it their best shot.

Another One Bites The Dust
The Ifrit strikes again. After Terry and Patrick tie Eller up, they leave him to turn him into the authorities. Terry knows that his story of this Ifrit is true, that the woman he shot put a curse on them and he saw it that night. Patrick tells him that he was drunk and high and now he’s crazy to believe that. We see Eller wake up tied up as the Ifrit consumes him, burning him to ashes.

Jesus Makes An Appearence
Lafayette wakes to see Jesus’ head with his mouth sewn shut and trying to tell him something. His mom, Ruby Jean, is having the same vision of Jesus and calmly tells Jesus that she will tell Lafayette. Like mother, like son.

Tara Makes Use of Her Fangs
Tara is bartending at Fangtasia these days and when a girl begins to flirt with her, Tara starts to feed on her. This causes Pam to demand that Tara never feeds on someone in public again or they may be reported to the Authority. She did as Pam asked when Hoyt propositioned her for a bite. They ended up in a bathroom stall, right next to Jessica and her snack, so when Hoyt asked her to stop, Jessica heard and began to fight with Tara over Hoyt. Tara just can’t win.

Sam and Luna are shot
A worried Sam shows up at Luna’s house to tell her about their friends murder. She begins to cry but when Sam tried to comfort her she tells him to leave. He tells her he will be back to check on her tomorrow and starts off to leave. Suddenly he is shot by a group of shit heads with rifles. Luna comes out to help Sam but they shoot her twice, so when Emma comes out Sam tells her to run. She shifts into the cutest little wolf pup and runs away. All while idiots in Obama Masks are filming as they are shooting.

Favorite Quote of The Week
A 3000 year old vampire wants to suck my blood. Must be Thursday! –Sookie

True Blood “We’ll Meet Again”

Tonight’s episode of True Blood was incredible! So much, so fast, I can’t get enough of it. Sookie seems to be on everyone’s shit list, she can give a big thanks to Arlene’s fat mouth. Shouldn’t she be more concerned about her husband leaving? Lafayette better get a hold of that demon inside him soon, before someone really gets hurt. Meanwhile, Eric and Bill begin the hunt for Russell Edgington. Alcide covers for Sookie by giving Debbie’s parents half truths, while Jason and Jessica did the same by glamouring Andy to forget Debbie Pelt. Then there is the murder of Sam’s shifter friends. I think that the guy from The Stake House did it, Sookie overheard him thinking about taking her on a “hunt”. We finally learn what happened to Terry and Patrick in Iraq. Also, Sookie gets drunk with Alcide and gets frisky! With all this action every week, I don’t know how I am going to continue to narrow it down to just 5 moments but for now I think I can manage. Here are my top 5 moments of “We’ll Meet Again”.

Pam Takes Tara In
When Pam’s feels Tara killing herself through the bond, she goes to Tara and commands her not to do anything like that again, ever. Tara is extremely frustrated but she goes along with Pam back to Fangtasia, having no place else to go. Pam teaches Tara to properly feed on a human. Tara, refused to feed on a human, but was commanded to do so and wasted no time before giving in to her urges to feed.

Eric Releases Pam
Eric has a heart to heart with Pam, telling her that him going after Russell is a suicide mission because he will either die at the hands of Russell or the Authority. She explains that she wants to fight beside him, that she would die a thousand times for him. He tells her that it is not because he doesn’t trust her, he does, but it’s because he wants her to live on, as she is his only legacy. She accepts his wishes and she is released from him.

Jason Is Told How His Parents Really Died
While Jason is at the Faery Club, he runs into Hadley, his cousin. She tells him that him and Sookie should be here to them safe them from vampires. He tells her that Sookie might just be safer with the vampires after what happened to her in faery the last time. She then tells him that she isn’t, and that vampires will kill her just like they killed their parents. Jason is confused at first because he has believed this entire time that his parents died in a flood. When he wants more answers she tells him that she already said way too much, just as they are interrupted by the woman Jason was with before he spoke with Hadley. Jason and Andy are soon kicked out and Jason is left with many question with no answers.

4th of July In Iraq Flashback
We finally see what happened in Iraq that has Terry and Patrick going after their squad mate, Brian Eller. His trigger happy finger got them into a shoot out that night, killing a family. When they find Eller’s underground bunker they go down into it and see that Eller seems to have an obsession with fire. Then we hear the cocking of a gun right behind Terry and Patrick. Looks like they forgot all their training.

The Authority Found Another Rat
Or so we are led to believe after Salome and Roman spoke with Nora. Chancellor Drew had some incriminating evidence on his computer of him killing a human and sending the video to known members of Sanguinista. His explanation, he was infiltrating them. Roman, not allowing Drew to explain about this alleged infiltration, grabbed him and staked him. Personally, I believe that Salome is behind all this. I trust her about as far as I can throw the bitch. She knows how to get what she wants and she is good at it. A true seductress. Roman better wake up soon or he will be next.

Favorite Quote of The Week
Sookie, you fucking did it! Well, no need for apologies, right? I’m certainly not waiting for one. Barely remember what we got our head up over. Let bygones be bygones, bi girls be bi girls. — Pam

True Blood “Whatever I Am, You Made Me”

Tonight was the third episode of the season, titled “Whatever I Am, You Made Me”. Times are a changing for everyone. Get ready for a whole lot of Steve Newlin, who was announced as the new Nan Flanagan. Jason has a run in with an old lover and it gives him an epiphany. Andy’s ass is seen all around town. Holly and Andy make their romance official. Meanwhile, Hoyt is trying out a new lifestyle. Terry and Patrick take off to figure out who is starting the fires. Also, Tara comes out of the freezer and gives everyone a shock. All of that’s only a fraction of the action this week. Here are my top 5 moments from this weeks episode, “Whatever I Am, You Made Me”

Eric and Bill extent their life expectancy
Eric and Bill are given the chance to find Russell Edgington. They are suited up with a device called the iStake. It is both a tracking device and a way to meet the true death with the touch of a button. They control it with an app on their iPhone. If Eric or Bill try to run or fail in their mission, it will be activated and our sexy duo will be goo.

How Pam became a Vampire
More trips down memory lane for Pam. We see after their late night run in, he went to her brothel and requested to be with her. She declined, saying that a good merchant does not compete with her merchandise. He replied that everything has its price. She apparently does, needing Eric to get rid of a couple of vampires who have been killing her girls off. Surprise, surprise, we see a newly made vampire Bill and Lorena draining one of Pam’s girls. Eric barges in, while Pam watches from a screened window, and has a word with Lorena. She apologizes for the trouble they have caused, but Bill would rather fight Eric for threatening them. Silly Bill! After that is finished, Eric collects and they have a roll in the sack. Afterwards, Pam begs that he turn her. He refuses only to be left with one of two choices. Pam has slit her wrists, telling him that either he turns her or watches her die.

Jason, Hot For Teacher
Looks like Jason was always popular with the ladies. After a run in with his old high school teacher, Ms. Steeler, while grocery shopping, Jason goes to her house for a cup of tea and sex. Although she was hesitant at first and told him what she did to him was wrong, she quickly gave in after he put his hand in between her thighs. After sex he realizes that sex with her at such a young age has been the reason he has used sex with women to fill a void. He no longer wants to do this.

Salome, The Seductress
We learn that Salome is the Salome from the New Testament. The bible states that she dances for her uncle at his birthday celebration. Afterwards, he gives her his oath that he will give her anything she asks for, she asks for the head of John The Baptist, at the request of her mother. She seduces Bill and Eric to gain more perspective about their beliefs. Roman calls her his secret weapon before jumping into the bed with her. I think that she is playing Roman. Salome is seen as a femme fatal and I see no reason that it would change here. She is not to be trusted. I believe that she is Sanguinista. She told Roman that he should take a different approach because mainstreaming has divided vampires, that she is afraid for him. She is trying to manipulate him in subtle ways.

Sookie shares her secret with Alcide
He was not happy to find out that Sookie lied to his face. He punches a dent into his truck and leaves Sookie scared about what he will do with the information. Very doubtful that Alcide will turn Sookie into the authorities or the Pelt’s.

Favorite Quote of The Week
Lorena, you procreated! Oh, and he is protective! — Eric